Emotional Retention

A certain form of parenthood is based on emotional retention.
In the same way that informational retention can be used to maintain an upper hand on the frustrated recipient, emotional retention maintains the child (or the adult-to-be, if he/she has integrated such modalities) away from anything which could make a healthy relation.
These people are floating at bay along disheartened currents.

Emotional retention is a behavioral grammar, integrated and unconsciously taught to those who suffer from it.
Through the application of those unwritten rules, all participants to this game of coldness and distance, even though they may argue in favor of effiency, or the uselessness of such criteria, are all victims.

By never swimming in the warm waters near the heart, they remain aloof, clumsy victims of those games of loneliness.

They don’t know how to say it,
They don’t know how to remain silent and watch,
They do not know the embrace of the mindful gesture.

Such parents are broken-winged birds.
They keep turning in suffering circles and never really fly off.

When the nestling hops anywhere near a usual experience of suffering,
They are scared to take him under their wing.
In the cold silence of emotional retention, each wounded bird dries in the wind staring right in front of them. Yet, they are united by this muted language.

Children may have this calling from the depths of their abounding resources, an ego that is un-solidified yet, allowing them to hop under the broken wing of their parent, to squeeze in and heal them in silence.

Franck Joseph – ©FJ Jan 2021
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