Live With / Live Against

I can see … Waves of sadness come and go ,
I hear myself calling the high tides of sadness
And see my strange attachment when swimming in salty water.

Immersed in familiar melancholy
Bathed in loneliness.
Then abandoned again as waters withdrew
This water is the sanction I receive today
For having still believed, waited, hoped
For things to go differently.

I placed my hope in the model of heavy and laborious materials,
For a few continents of open doors, it slammed back at the first draft.

In order not to suffer from it, I must be and not wait.
And stop hoping to be understood, heard by those who soak their whole body in oily pools of noise. Stop taking unchecked arrows in the heart, shot while I was back, knees on the ground.

I must stop believing they were meant to be.
I was merely passing that is all, I’ve been there for 40 years.

So you have to be an idiot not to have learned..
That, when shot arrows come and pierce my skin,
But if my body is elsewhere,
if my heart no longer hopes,
How could I ever be hurt ?

Of course, I would like those games of egos to exhaust you as they exhaust me.
You must not be tired enough yet.
I am exhausted.

For me, for you, for everyone,
I am now transparent.

The being with whom you talk about the things people talk about, does not exist.
He is elsewhere. you are conversing with a ghost.

The being against whom you exist,
Doesn’t feed you anymore.
He has deserted.

Worse: whether you join me or not, whether you ever come to me or not is no longer my problem.

If I thought it was, it was the result of pretentiousness.

©FJ July 2022 —
Groupe de Pratique
Recueils — Participations