The contentious status of a relation to the other is, before anything else, a relation to all conflict energies present in the relation we have with a representation of this person.
Every conflict is the place for a non-appeased relation with a certain image of an other person.
An image which I have fed and entertained within myself.
From this statement stems a very good news : the physical absence of the person with whom I am in a situation of conflict or the unavailability of this person to find a way out of the conflict is absolutely not blocking the way to pacifying.
Though the practice of sitting, through the inner space it allows to emerge, I gain access to my representation of the other person.
I can figure out how fragmentary, erroneous this representation may be. I watch all energies at play while sustaining this representation.
I see that person, as it is, in my mind, deprived of any objective existence.
This psychological bubble, which I name ‘X’, has no reality.
Then, I observe this same energy, devoid of support trying to get hold of another host, …which will turn out to be as illusory as the one it just left.
This process may take years, months, or a few seconds.
The rush of suffering, thus solidified as ‘conflict energy’, starts dissolving.
So hard, so real to my eyes a few moments ago, so painful in my chest,
It is no more.
Unlike all other systems (personal development, psychoanalysis….), the practice of sitting
offers a perspective sufficient to let go off the grasp.
Freed from the shackles of representations, I can summon the other in my practice. I do not lock him up in the tight nets of my representations, artificial and patchy.
The other, then, becomes all the others.
And the outcome of the conflict energy happens on every moment,
Wherever I sit.